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Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Thought in the sleepless night.

This is a personal post. Read and don't judge. 

We must be a faker in some point in life. It is true.

You cannot always be yourself.
There are some people out there who can only become faker all the while. They are evil, they are fake, they just trying to hide their dark sides by showing innocent smile on their face.

Yes, I don't understand why you are always right and I am always wrong. You are always telling me what to do instead of seeking my opinions. You are always giving me instructions instead of discussing with me. 

When things go wrong, I get the blame. 

It is indeed a gloomy day. Things do not always go as plans. I am depressed yet there is nothing much I can do. 

People judges. I am writing for my own interest and own passion. I want to share my life, my feeling and my story. I understand it well. I don't get any benefits in writing, I don't usually get rewards to write the posts. Rewards are a form of motivation for me to continue blogging but even without rewards, I will still continue to blog. 
However, people don't understand it. They claimed that I am writing because I want to get benefits, want to get fame and seeking for attention. 
Just shut up when you don't even know a thing about me. 

Life is not fair. There is no equity in this world. Stop telling me what health promotion equity thingy. I don't understand a single word. Health promotion programmes cannot work. Maybe it works well in other country but not in my country where equity doesn't exist. 

There are people who suffered from illnesses but still struggling to live longer, there are people who are perfectly healthy but struggling to end their life. 

Everyone believes in something. No one can endure the stress and cares of life without faith in something that cannot ultimately be proven. 
What is to be decided is what we are willing to believe in. 

People who lose faith in life will become directionless, demotivated and ultimately helpless. 

I don't know what to believe in. I don't have faith in everything. I doubted myself, my ability and my life. I have doubt in everything. 

At the end, I only can believe in God. Believe that He will give me the best and have faith in Him. 

I know what I am going to say below doesn't make any sense since I am always being negative and demotivated but I still want to give all my best wishes to you. 

To my beloved friend who are fighting against illness, Be strong, be tough and just believe in God. He will always have a plan for you. Don't get demotivated and be positive, I believe that you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. 

(Picture from http://nickwaltersblog.wordpress.com/2013/10/22/is-there-light-at-the-end-of-your-tunnel-psalm-401-3/)

Keep this in mind and have faith in yourself and the world. Just believe that everything is going to be alright eventually. 

Love, 
Sherlyn. 


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